Friday, June 11, 2010

I'll call it 'Sh-ecards', and I'll be rich

I was feeling thoughtful this morning, so decided I would send an ecard to a comrade of mine. All I wanted was a simple, good luck ecard. What I found was either so sappy that I found myself nauseous, or so generic that I questioned the point in even sending it in the first place. So I've decided to start a more honest card company, with greetings like:

"If we could learn to communicate more effectively in real life, picking out a greeting card for you would be a whole lot easier. ________________!"

"You stress me out, induce migraines and give me sleepless nights, and against my better judgement, I think I might possibly love you. At the very least, I like you a lot. _______________!"

"I'm sending you this card because you've been kind to me and now I feel obligated to be kind in return. ________________!"

These are just a few ideas I have rattling around in the ol' noggin. I thought I'd keep the cards universal by omitting the expression, providing you the freedom to fill in the blank for whatever occasion may arise.

Now all I need is someone with capital.

I'm neurotic today because...
...nooo, these greeting cards are in no way based on my life.

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